A Brighter Light

by Brook Pridemore

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    Beautiful 12" version of the 4th Brook Pridemore album, on Say-10 Records. High Quality, virgin vinyl.

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about

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released March 17, 2009

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Track Name: Minot to Bozeman
I should have known you were trouble the first time you opened your mouth
But there is nothing east of Billings, and Billings is a hole in the ground
I drove from Minot to Bozeman, in one dotted line, all alone
I was searching for answers to things I couldn't work out at home
Yeah and you were the last black spot on my mind as I adjusted the mirrors
and shifted into drive and watched the Comstock flatline pass the horizon forever
If you pack my red box with five dozen quality jugs
I will drink them resounding and leave the returns on the rug
I drove from Minot to Bozeman, the sun beating hot on my skin
Cuz you hold me responsible now for things I might have said then
When I was running on fumes, and the Bonnie was so I took to guzzling white lightning
and ran for the Coast, and I prayed that separation would help us to get it together
I was dragged from a smarter fella's dream,
punched the clock until my hand began to bleed
And watched as a blanket of pure driven snow kept my actions in line
Me I'm still brandishing the sword
As a petty squabble spirals into war
Put your foot to the carpet, try to make it to the safehouse in time.
At a truck stop in Rocker, I picked at the scabs til they bled
And bashed penny arcade sized lumps in the sides of my head
I drove from Minot to Bozeman, I raised a dry fist to your health
Thought I was running from you, when I was running away from myself
With nothing but white paper lines on the sun, I adjusted the wipers and shifted
into run, but I know in my cockles, that nothing will ever get better
Track Name: The Buckeye State and Russell
He started talking at my face about the government these days,
as though my politics were written across my shirt
And then a Steinway-sized obstruction, like the upright in your living room
took refuge in my throat, and put me at a loss for words.
I didn't come here to proselytize, I came to bring the noise,
but all your static's running razors cross my dome
And still the beating of my heart, cracked and chipped, but held together
keep pulsating like a rusty metronome

I tried to run away from home, packed a bag and I was gone
Left the house like I was going to the store,
but I got halfway down the block, thought my heart was gonna stop
ran back upstairs and didn't even take my shoes off at the door
I could leave this town tonight, move down the street from Endless Mike:
The Buckeye State and Russel seem so warm and clean.
But still the beating of my heart, cracked and chipped but held together
keep pulsating like a rusty drum machine.

I think the kids in this town are the greatest,
but I would lose my mind if I stayed here for more than a day.
And if they knocked down the walls and the Big Time crumbled to embers
I would save myself and watch the old model just slip away.

There are no dark corners in Brooklyn.
And a rooftop skyline eyesight is all that I need.
I have a family of friends and support of the people who love me.
And we don't go west to the Big Time's epistle of greed.

I heard from Julie via Michael about an astronaut who'd never seen an angel
about a scientist who'd never seen a mind.
Yet he'd spent his whole life chasing something whispered, and imaginary:
Something he had dreamt but never stood a chance to find.
I know exactly how he felt, I thought my head was gonna melt,
I should have left that shady grove for somewhere new.
With the beating of my heart, never broken never crumbled,
kept pulsating like a normal heart should do.
Track Name: Overtyme
Watch me, like a junkie, shuffle past the party store, and go without the magic trick that worked so well, before. C-c-cauterize my instinct, leave my virtue clean, intact. But trouble always seems to draw a bead on where I am at, anyway. Country crunk, the boy's club, fluid motion, solid lines. I'm no hometown hero, fetishize idyllic times. Watch me like a liar, fake a smile and bum a light. And double barrel pondscum, watch me vainly making last call last all night. Even if you begged me, both knees down and slobbering I would sooner bleed to death than ever keep your company, again. Overtyme, your only hope. You could hang the boy for lying, if you only had some rope. Overtyme, you're seeing red. You should make a stronger effort not to get stuck in your head. Overtyme, it's only you. You're never lonely in the middle, but there's not a lot to do. Overtyme, burns your eyes when you look up from the bottom, see the sun, about to rise, Overtyme.
Track Name: Remain Upright
So, even when the weather broke, we never even go outside. I got a laundry list of debtors, and a multitude of reasons to hide. You started clawing at my throat, never even break the skin. I got a green satin jacket, from when Larry Bird was only a kid.
Track Name: Mr. Two First Names
She took my hand, it wavered like a compass.
I'd gotten used to feeling in control.
My hesitation aside, we danced like bright red dervishes protesting the war
And the cynic inside me wondered what the fighting was for.

Michael David, Tempe, AZ.
A Rolling Rock, like Elvis on gray screen:
You cross the gap between the dock and steerage never worried about your health
And I wonder if I'll ever find that freedom inside of myself.
I feel like even when the phone stops ringing, pigs be breathin' down my neck.
And when Caullie comes a callin' best believe that he's callin' collect.

No one even noticed when I snuck aboard that black and yellow train
they sneak into the station, when they think that no one's looking.
Everything is possible, the world is just a fraction,
I get a certain satisfaction, out of being held responsible.
Someone's pushing buttons in my head.
Someone's taking candy from my baby.

One eye open, you barely let the light in.
A screaming fight, the average Lincoln scene.
I took a bottle cap down to the Liquor store, where everybody there was dressed like The Who
and they turned around, staring, rubberneckin' at me and at you.
I feel like even when the phone stops ringin' pricks be stickin' in my back,
And you wonder why I shudder when you tell me to breathe and relax.
Track Name: A Brighter Light
The sun goes down on Macon, turns your red hair slightly gold
We brace ourselves together, to embrace the bracing cold
Having gotten used to January, since the big man put the frost on hold

Moonlight on your face is like a stolen compact disc
You pressed into my pocket to employ my rule of wrist
Seems I've jumped the gun again, I'm running, even though the band don't give a riff.

I have put your picture in a brighter light than you could ever hope to crown
Much like Kokomo is just another stained-blue collar Indiana town

D train out to Coney Island, or where it used to be
The brand-new bastard skyline is like a water sale to me
Where'm I gonna sleep when my home had been turned from liquid to liquidity

2 train up to Harlem, our bodega had been burned down
They're mining for a diamond, I was born to hate this town
Like zirconium could ever fool the dull, the rich, the few, the vain, the proud

I have put your picture in a brighter light than you could ever hope to crown
much like Kokomo is just another stained-blue collar Indiana town

Santa Fe, New Mexico, I saw him in a dream
Alive atop a flaming pile of tires
"You've been dead two years," I said.
"I never died," said he.
And I laughed, I can always tell a liar.

We never got to Macon, but the salt was in the air.
And something on your faces told me that no one really cared.

Ether spares the microphone, and Robin is at the door.
And I fold my arms and say that I don't love you anymore.
There's a time and place for lying, and that's lying cold and broken on the floor.

I made the same mistake again by putting faith in dreams, they always let me down.
I've got one head on my shoulders in the clouds and two feet planted on the ground.
Oh, but then New York City feels like it's alive with light, at least when you're around.
Much like Kokomo is just another stained-blue collar Indiana town.
Track Name: Trite Fidelity
I could scrape myself clean and fill the gaps between the synapses and sinew in my head. Re-prioritize, and cut you down to size, but you haven't heard a word I said. You bubble, stuffed with swamp luck, trapped in trite fidelity, til I have no strength and no voice left to scream. I was born with her grin, and a healthy taste for sin. But I spread the sheets and blankets on this bed, and I intend to watch the sun come up, again.
Track Name: Just Like Nathan Hale, P. 2
I was hangin' by a tendon over the empty hole we'd dug ourselves in
And thinkin' Mister, we could use a man like Tricky Richard Nixon again
'Cause if you nailed your best intentions to the ancient cross he bore for you that whole time
You would know then what it's like to tell the truth and still be caught in a lie.

I've knelt where they kneel, and I've drank from that cup
And I will not hesitate to follow you up.

There's an angry, fat pornographer, his voice is fanning me through the flames
He's saying, "Every time I go back to the bottle, I break out in chains."
But if you nail your best intentions to the stupid stuff he spat at me that whole damn day,
You would know then what it's like to have a normal life and throw it away.

I've knelt where they kneel, and I've drank from that cup
And I will not hesitate to follow you up.

But in the backyard dumpster, Petey's sitting like a lump,
he's breaking branches across the backs of his knees,
and saying I'm the only reason that he gulped
and gave a second stab at life.
Now I am hanging from the monkey bars a couple dozen years ago,
the blood is flowing up to my brain
and I am holding up a banner screaming, "Tigers stay alive in '85."
I'm not just holding up a banner, but screaming "Tigers stay alive in '85."

When you get down to the bottom, where the Interstate connects with the trees
I feel like all my Jesus freak friends have a pretty big advantage on me.
'Cause if you nail your best intentions to the simple truths he told to all us dudes
You would know then what it's like to kill the messenger what brought you the news.

I've knelt where they kneel, I've drank from that cup
And I will not hesitate to follow you up.
Track Name: Just Like Nathan Hale, P. 1
Put yourself up on the cross that he bears for you, sometime. Make up your mind, make up your mind. Follow me down to the floor, if you need a reminder. Make up your mind, make up your mind. And I will walk, eyes closed, into the sin. I will march, to that field, tied to the wind.
Track Name: Endlessly
Close your eyes, punch the clock
Bang the drum, put your pants on.
Do the math, write the check
Lick the stamp, sing a sad song.
Lock the door, scratch your legs.
Hope he snuffed out all the eggs.
Down the hall, a different world
across the street, different.

Jefferson, grab a seat
Stretch your legs, get a write up.
Walk the walk, raise your voice
Clear your throat, pass the red sauce.
Catch the F, go downtown,
spend a whole day underground.
Live your dream, go back home,
Close your eyes, let it all go.

You talk in circles, got him barking up your tree.
And I bleed like hopelessness poured out of me
Endlessly.

Build a wall, hide your eyes
Close the drapes, keep 'em guessing.
Burn the bridge, take the cash,
Flip the switch, turn a corner
Cross the stage, take a bow
Spend your whole like looking down.
Live your dream, go back home,
close your eyes, let it all go.
Be prepared, stay informed,
have a plan, keep your dukes up.
Raise your glass, hold the floor,
while your life takes a nose dive.
Brace yourself for the worst
If the drugs don't kill you first.
Save yourself, save yourself,
Save yourself, savior
(self).

You talk in circles, got him barking up your tree.
And I bleed like hopelessness poured out of me
Endlessly.
Track Name: Song For Linda Perry
With everything Grey Cell Green in the end
Canary-yellow legal pad, and a felt tip black pen
Sat down on the corner of 12th St. and A
as though I lived upstairs.
My mind was a razor, my mouth was agape,
as 1,000 words a minute committed my dailies to tape,
but I bleat, like a mute in the steeple, with dust in the air.

And my hand clamped, a vice on the stylus,
as my bad buy beat out everything I wanted to say.
Now I can see clearly, now, that when the rain is gone
there's gonna be a black spot on the pavement that day.

My whole world made up of this violet dread
Put down all the times that I wished you were dead.
Licked the seal, kissed the stamp, dropped my arm,
walked home and walked tall.
And I realized quickly, in a haze of white noise,
that for the first time in months, I missed the sound of your voice
the only eyes on my back were the lights
of the next passing car.

And my hand clamped, a vice on the stylus,
as my bad guy bleat out everything I wanted to say.
Now I can see clearly, now, that when the rain is gone
there's gonna be a black spot on the pavement that day.

I peeled back the paper where we used to run tongues,
I made doubly certain that every line had been crossed
on the beach, where we once stubbed our toes
in a rush to the fall.
With nothing to eat, and a notch in my belt
I felt then like Linda Perry must have felt
when she quit that band, and took up a room with
no doors and no walls.

And my hand clamped, a vice on the stylus,
as my bad guy bleat out everything I wanted to say.
Now I can see clearly, now, that when the rain is gone
there's gonna be a black spot on the pavement that day,
and it's gonna be a bright, bright sunshine-y day.
Track Name: Stockholm St. Syndrome
He drank himself to death the same day monthlies came in due, because the good ones all were taken (He'd spent his savings on the papers). And the asphalt must look bleaker, on the dark side of the pool, because he caught the first boat over, and cut the chase to baiting racial slurs at every pinche gringo that drove past, to try to make the message last. So, when the rent comes due for me, I change my plans, and try to be the bigger man. He asked if I was lonely, he tried to follow me inside, but I had barely got to know him, so I slammed the door behind me, ran upstairs and past the Party, took a diver off the roof, sprouted wheels and crossed the country, stopped for gas in Palo Alto. And, every day, I'm running from the guilt, and I will stay that way until I meet a girl who fucks like drums and holds my hand, and I will stay right where I am.
Track Name: The Year I Get it Right
Every summer, I declare that this'll be the year I get out there and burn all my troubles in the summer light, and this'll be the year I get it right. Til the sun comes out tomorrow, and I'm stuck inside wondering how much I loved you, and why. Checked the lock so hard I broke the key, now there's nothing there between the world and me. There's a well-fed army down the hall, and I can't explain what's bleeding through the wall. I've been wasting cake and paper, in these troubled times, wondering how much I loved you, and why. I missed the boat, but have no fear that I won't be alone this time, next year. With a hope insurgent, burning bright that this'll be the year I get it right. I have finished treading lightly, when I meant to dive, and I'm wondering how much I loved you, and why. So every summer, I declare that this'll be the year I get out there and burn all my troubles in the summer light, and this'll be the year I get it right. Now, I will shine a brighter light, and this'll be the year I get it right.